The Old Man That Made Me Cry

My day job involves working with people trying to keep their homes, and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Doing my job, you develop a thick skin and learn how to ask the customers for the info you need to process their modification applications. I talked to this man on the phone who was out of options, but I still needed something from him.

He was an older Latino man, and he kind of sounded like my grandpa. Maybe that's why I reacted so strongly to him. I'm not sure but I do know he had zero incentive to work with me, and he had already moved out of the property. Most people in that situation are at best apathetic and at times quite brutal, but this man was so kind it moved me. I asked him if he received any kind of assistance since he said he was no longer working. "No" he said, he lived at the church. He thanked me profusely for my call and was intent to do what I needed for my purposes. Again he had no incentive. He had no money. He had no job, yet he was supernaturally kind to me. He was grateful. He was a living epistle.

I never realized how often I complain until I saw myself through the prism of this man. I realized I'm not that grateful. I understood at that moment that if he can be such a beautiful example of a Christian in his situation, it means I can never complain, because I have too much to be grateful for.

When I get to be that age, I pray that I am half as strong as that man was, half as humble, half as noble. When I hung up with him, I was moved nearly to tears. I'm not sure if he will ever know how much he impacted me, but I will not soon forget him or his example. He was amazing. And that's how the old man made me cry.

Could it be that we're broken?

You know, we always think that things are pretty much going as they should be. On some level, most of us accept that since things are how they are, that this current state of being is normal, to be expected and acceptable. And we have this expectation that we are able to get things to where we want them to be if we just try hard enough.

Yet we look through history and see that all of our repeated attempts at perfection always come up short.

Always.

I'm no math whiz, but I think that's almost 100%.

Every time men come up with rules for living together in perfect harmony, it fails. Socialism is a beautiful idea, but it doesn't work. The Tower of Babel was supposed to be an incredible testament to the strength of humanity, but instead, it became the eternal symbol for our disunity and fallenness. Jews came up with 613 rules of behavior in order to keep the Law. Not one of them was able to keep it. Muslims have sharia law, but in the places that it is practiced it is failing to maintain a peaceful society, let alone a perfect one. Why is it that every time we try to achieve this harmony that we all desire, we fail?

Could it be that we're broken?

Maybe we can't achieve perfection because we are all imperfect. Maybe we are made in such a way that attaining perfection is outside of our grasp. Romans 3:20 says that the Law allows us not to be justified but "to become conscious of our sin." No matter what we do, we will find sin. And nothing we can do is able to remove our sins. In fact, even if we do nothing, that is a sin.

We have had thousands of years to try to create the perfect society. But across the globe, across religions, across time all of our efforts have failed to produce one single example of perfection. Maybe we've gotten close, but even if the society functions well, within each individual member, sin is present.

We cannot be justified by works. And maybe all of our failed efforts to produce perfection will allow us to see that.

We are broken.

We are fallen.

We need a Savior.

And his name is Jesus.

Greater is He

Two nights ago, I preached at a youth event I help lead. One of the largest groups we were expecting could not make it and it had not been as well publicized as previous events had been, so frankly, I was really nervous that it would be a letdown from some of our previous events.

I felt like I hadn't put as much daily effort into it as usual.

It kind of snuck up on our whole team.

It was at a new location.

There were some communication problems in the planning of it originally.

As the worship team was ministering, I was praying desperately in the background for God to use the team in ministering and me in preaching to glorify Himself.

In a lot of ways, I felt like I was in over my head because the night before, there was a pretty significant change in the way my sermon was going to be done. But it didn't matter. Because Greater is He that's in me than He that is in the world.

Sometimes, as a spiritual leader, people constantly need you for guidance and decision-making. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that your are self-sufficient. It's easy to think that because others rely on you, that you do indeed have it all figured out. And it's easy to think that the world is dependent on your efforts.

Among spiritual leaders, the "Superman Complex" is the really strong, and I count myself chief among those that have this disease.

God used me that night, and many people commented on how much I had grown as a preacher. The fact is that I hadn't grown. I had diminished. God had grown inside of me.

He used that night to remind me of my dependence upon Him. I'm not Superman. He is. And sometimes, it takes the feeling of being unprepared for me to realize that God is God, and He doesn't need me. I need Him.

How beautiful.