The Art of Being

I'm a doer.

Always have been. When I was in high school I was an officer in the Student Council, was a member of LULAC, Choir, Wrestling, Key Club, the school's main Christian club and in my free time helped create a second Christian club.

At church, I sang on the worship team, taught a small group, taught a leadership class, attended a small group, helped lead the youth group and taught Sunday school.

Currently, I work full time, go to school full time, run a youth ministry and most importantly, I got married a year and a half ago so I have a wonderful wife with whom I like to spend most of my time.

As you can see, I keep myself busy.

This makes me feel useful and productive and it has helped a lot of people, thank God. But I realized with all that activity, I had forgotten something very important about myself.

My wife drives ridiculously fast. I mean, NASCAR fast. And it's not when we're in a hurry- it's everywhere. Of course, she tells me I drive like a tortoise and then I try to explain to her that the speed limit is a maximum, not a minimum speed. It does not work.

Since I'm so busy, I often have to sacrifice time with my family, with whom I am quite close. But I started noticing that over the last few years, I could more readily find times where I couldn't be with them than times in which I could. I also noticed that I was not as kind or tender to everyone as I had been in previous years. I had the convenient excuse of being busy, and needing to focus and that was mostly true. But in all my rushing to get school done, to get work done, to write my next sermon or finish my next paper, I had forgotten to pause to just be.

I was living my life the way my wife drives.

So I decided that this year (let's not call it a resolution, let's call it a commitment instead) that I would spend more time with my mom, dad, brothers, sisters and friends and less time "keeping busy".

It bugged me a little bit that I would not be achieving something with that time, but I noticed something. In the down times, I felt my family relax. I felt them open up to me. And I had opportunities to speak into my friends' and family's lives not as the achieving Superman youth pastor but as husband, brother, son, and friend. I am realizing now that sometimes, I don't need to do anything (or everything) to feel right. I don't have to always be going, going, going full speed to be significant or to have an impact. Sometimes, I just need to be and that is enough.

So this year, I'm learning the Art of Being. Wish me luck.